American Idol

I went to a recording of American Idol today. My thoughts were: how much does this cost to put on and keep up? This includes all of the employees, the security guards, the people checking in my cell phone, the people on lights, the woman that counts 10,9,8,...to signal to Ryan Seacrest that he's on the air, the lights themselves, the 3 huge screens magnifying what's going on on stage to the whole crowd, the air conditioning it takes to keep a room on that size "comfortable.," the list goes on and on. I told my friend who I went with, "there are people all over the world who have never even seen a TV. Imagine how many people you could feed if you used 1/100th of the money used to produce this show."

I know it sounds so cliché, "there are starving kids in Africa." But the truth is there are starving people everywhere.

I guess it depends on how you define less fortunate. There are various stages of "fortune." There are people who are alive, they're fortunate, they have their lives. There are people who are alive and ill, what does that make them? There are those that have everything in the world, but I wouldn't consider them fortunate. All I'm trying to say is I wish people would not be so selfish and self-centered. I mean, maybe it's human nature to be selfish? I personally think it's human nature to want to help others, and see the joy we can give other people. Why then have we evolved to be such a greedy species?

Thoughts??

Focus on What You Have

I have recently been consumed by the incessant thoughts of a failed friendship. The subject comes up in all of my conversations and when I am idly sitting in class, at work, in bed, on the bus, etc. my thoughts linger to this friendship that will not seem to work no matter how hard I try to force it. So therein lies the problem. I am trying to force it. I have learned through many experiences in my short life that you cannot force anything. If something is meant to happen, it will force itself upon you, no matter how hard you try to avoid it. And the same is true for the converse, if something is not supposed to happen, no matter how hard you try to make it work, nature will not allow it.

My aunt was visiting me this past weekend, and we had an amazing time together (as always). She gave me advice that I really should apply to my life. She said she's tired of people focusing on things that they don't have, rather than what they do. Rather than obsessing over this friendship that I cannot seem to make work, why don't I focus on the wonderful people I do have in my life? The friends that listen to me rant and rave about this failing friendship. The friends that are always there, a phone call away, to listen to me cry, or tell me they love me and are happy when I am, who would do just about anything for me.

So that's what I will do, I will love my friends and family and give them the attention and respect they deserve, and you should to :).

Bread & Cie.

I was meeting a friend for brunch at Bread & Cie. today in Hillcrest. I'd heard about it before and in fact I read a review about it just yesterday. I met this particular friend at Chuao, the chocolate shop at which I work. We immediately bonded over our love for chocolate and we later discovered (and are still finding) that our lifestyles are also very similar.

While waiting for her, I surveyed the restaurant, it was pleasantly crowded, the demographic not what I'm used to over by UCSD, there were more families, couples of all ages, and groups of middle aged people who have the time and money to enjoy an elegant Saturday brunch. I read and re-read the menu. I examined the pastry selection. I was politely asked if I needed help just enough times to make me feel very welcome. I then did what I do at every restaurant/cafe/bakery I go to. I asked one of the people working behind the counter what her favorite pastry was, prefacing her response with a confession of it needing to be chocolate. She was very sweet and described all of the chocolate pastries for me. I then asked the same question, to a different person, regarding the bread. When Susi arrived, she introduced me to Freddy, who I'm assuming is the owner and welcomed me time and time again.

We split the Cranberry & Goat Cheese Salad. It was excellent. Baby greens tossed in a tangy and sweet dressing, sprinkled with dried cranberries, candied walnuts and a mini ice-cream scoop's worth of a fabulously creamy goat cheese. The goat cheese had a balsamic reduction drizzled on it which gave the tart cheese taste a very subtle sweetness, accented by the similarly tart taste of the vinegar. We also split the Marzipan. This exceeded both of our expectations. It was a 2.5 inch log of seemingly whipped marzipan, filled with some sort of chocolate ganache/marzipan center, and either end was dipped in chocolate. It was light and fluffy with just the perfect taste of bitter almond, characteristic of marzipan. Naturally we had to try the Flourless Chocolate Cake, it was light and melted in my mouth. It was topped with the perfect amount of chocolate ganache topping, which was cold in contrast to the cake. It also melted in my mouth but at a much slower rate than the cake, leaving a sweet, dark chocolate chunk of frosting to chew after the cake had dissolved. We also had the Blood Orange tea which was served with a small tea cookie, which was excellent, crisp, sweet, but not too sweet and a perfect companion to our tangy tea.

While getting a cup of water, I noticed someone had left their macaroon, neatly folded in it's bag on the condiments counter. I went to return it to one of the cashiers, and she told me to just keep it. Delightful.

Overall, I was thoroughly impressed with my experience at Bread & Cie. The food is delicious, the service exceptional and the staff warm, friendly and human.

Sand Bagger

My cross country coach in high school used to call the students who would sprint the last quarter mile of the course, the part where all of your friends/teammates/family members were standing cheering you on, Sand Baggers. He said if you had all of that energy left in the end you didn't try hard enough throughout the rest of the course. Ya, he's probably right.

I think my college career has been of Sand Bagging nature. I started off great, excited, everything sounded so scholarly and I didn't actually believe that it was happening to me. Biochemistry? No, I'm just taking classes, like high school. What does it matter if I like this or not. You just take classes, begrudgingly study, and then you graduate with a degree, right? Well there I was living in the library, moving from class to class as though I were a zombie, programmed to move from Center Hall 206 at 10:00 am to Peterson 108 at 11:00 am. I took notes, you know, wrote down what seemed to be important. I used highlighters, that means you work hard. I answered the questions the TAs would ask, only by reading off the notes I had taken, they usually asked questions with answers that I had highlighted, so it made it easy, or maybe not easy, but logical. People thought I had it together. I fooled them because I got dressed in the morning. Rather than come to class in my pajamas and UGG boots, I wore pants and sweaters, button up tops and scarves. This is partly how I was raised and partly because I am self-conscious of my body and if I look put together, I think I can mask my flaws. Furthermore I talk a lot, if I talk enough I'm bound to say something right, especially when I'm reading off of my "notes." So I did this, miserably, I would break down during finals every quarter, that is 12 times in my college career. (11 actually, I still have one more round of tear-filled torture, accompanied by excessive amounts of caffeine and angry phone calls to my Mom). I would break down, and fight with myself and my family about changing my major. We would decide that college was just stressful and you have to do something hard to get ahead in life. (What "get ahead in life" means I'm not so sure, but it sounded convincing, especially when spoken to me in Arabic by a mother whose voice could put out a forest fire).

Now I am in my last quarter in college. I am realizing that I have hated this all along. I have been miserable and it has stopped me from doing things I love. I have kindly declined hanging out with friends or attending events I would have enjoyed for the incessant feeling of needing to study. But I have also realized that I need this education to get to my next step. Which I think is grad school. No matter what it is I just need to get through, and I might as well give it my all, as I'm here, and I like to give things my all, if I commit to them, they deserve my 100%.

I received an e-mail from my brother yesterday. He is out of the country on a volunteer mission doing medical and dental relief. He ended his long e-mail with "How is school and life going for you? You have less than a month left, you better be working your ass off you sand-bagger, this is the final sprint!" He's so right.

Happy Mother's Day.

I often think of who I would be without the guidance of my mom. I would not be 1/100th the person I am today. To start from the most basic, washing my hands, using the restroom (pardon the vulgarity), eating, grooming myself, to even the most complex of situations, being able to handle situations such as consoling a friend in need, for example. I have learned so much from her in both direct and indirect ways. Watching her interactions with people and seeing her handle life with grace and beauty. I aspire to be half the woman she is.

Mama and Me, Summer 2009

In honor of my mother, and all mother's in the world:

The most beautiful word on the lips of mankind is the word “Mother,” and the most beautiful call is the call of “My mother.” it is a word full of hope and love, a sweet and kind word coming from the depths of the heart. The mother is every thing – she is our consolation in sorrow, our hope in misery, and our strength in weakness. She is the source of love, mercy, sympathy, and forgiveness. He who loses his mother loses a pure soul who blesses and guards him constantly.


Every thing in nature bespeaks the mother. The sun is the mother of earth and gives it its nourishment of hear; it never leaves the universe at night until it has put the earth to sleep to the song of the sea and the hymn of birds and brooks. And this earth is the mother of trees and flowers. It produces them, nurses them, and weans them. The trees and flowers become kind mothers of their great fruits and seeds. And the mother, the prototype of all existence, is the eternal spirit, full of beauty and love.

Gibran Kahlil Gibran

Etiquette

It seems as if etiquette is no longer "in." I guess by in I mean no longer taught, encouraged or practiced in many parts of the world. I am not much of an expert on etiquette all over the world so I will stick with what I know. I was raised in California, by Syrian Catholic parents. Etiquette in Syrian society is very important. You always stand when a person walks in the room to greet them. You never put your feet on the table. You always have to have cookies or cake available in case somebody drops in for a visit, which accompany tea, coffee or juice and water. Furthermore, coffee is always served (if Turkish) in demitasse cups on saucers, if American, in coffee cups on saucers. They are always served on a tray, usually covered with a doily or some embroidered handkerchief. The coffee is always served with a class of water, also presented on a saucer. Once cannot drink the water immediately after drinking the coffee or else it tells the host that the coffee was not good. When serving the tray of coffee, which is always done by the maid (if in an upper-class home), the daughter, or the housewife, you must bend the tray down almost near the lap of the guest to accommodate their reach. The cookies/cake are served on a separate plate, and always followed by napkins. When asked about your work or school, you never say anything negative, even if the situation may call for that response, you always act thankfully. Complaining is not a public affair. You don't chew your gum too loudly. Or blow bubbles. No picking your nose. No touching your feet. When asked by a host if you'd like something to eat, you reject the offer, politely. When asked again, you reject again, if asked a third time, you must oblige unless you really really do not want anything, which even then may be rude to reject. When a family member dies, the women wear black for 40 days. This also entails no make up, which is very noticeable in Middle-Eastern women because they are always done up. If the person was very close to the woman, say her husband, she will typically wear black for the year following his death, often longer. Modesty is highly revered. When complimented about one's looks, it is typical to respond with a phrase such as "your eyes are the pretty ones" (which can be roughly translated to "beauty is in the eye of the beholder"). The first time you visit someone's house, you bring something, a plant, flowers, a box of chocolates, etc. When a friend has a child, you bring a gift and visit the baby. Most actions are guided by social etiquette. For example, returning phone calls. You don't want to seem like you are chasing after someone, so if you call them once and they do not return your phone call, you do not call again, you did your part, now you don't want to seem desperate. Of course there are exceptions, and not just to this "rule" but to all of these social "rules." I could go on and on and in fact one could write a whole book on the etiquette of the Middle East, which would be quite fascinating as it varies by region and religion and has been influenced by several outside sources such as various countries (colonization). I just found this interesting because my mom and her friends today were talking about their students (Americans) who behave in a certain way that they cannot even begin to fathom. They don't understand how some of the girls take off their shoes during class to air out their feet, this would be unheard of in say, Syria or Lebanon. I wanted to post because it's fascinating and maybe you could learn a thing or two. And I definitely could too.