Rodents

I really like that there are rats in the NY subway. Maybe that's not sanitary, because the rats carry diseases and maybe it's cruel because they often get run over by the trains and maybe it's weird that I like that rodents run on train tracks under one of the busiest cities in the world. But I think it's cool that in such a seemingly lifeless environment, these creatures live and procreate, despite the rodenticide that the city sets out to try to eliminate this problem. If you're not looking for them, you probably won't even see them, which is also a lesson in being alert and attentive. Cool stuff.

Money doesn't matter

I love when popular singers sing about money not being important. I disagree with them. You would be quite foolish to believe that in the society that we live, you would be able to survive without money. Maybe it's an unfortunate conclusion, but it's the reality. What I do believe is that it's absolutely terrible to obsess over money. Some people get so caught up in money and having an abundance of it that they lose their morals, values and/or beliefs in pursuit of wealth, only to find themselves completely consumed with obtaining more and more that they end up not enjoying what they have. Or never even realizing this unconquerable desire and die miserable.

Let me go back to what I said about popular singers' message to us common-folk. Of course they tell us to be happy without money, as they go home to a multi-million dollar home, multi-car garages filled with cars with tanks full of gas, I don't think they pay to fly all over the world for their concerts, or even if they did, the return from the concert makes it very worthwhile, and don't worry, you too would look like a Barbie doll if you had a personal chef and trainer who came to you rather than you chasing after them, ensuring your proper nourishment and daily exercise tailored to your personal needs. All of this costs money, and a lot of it. And where do they get that money? Recording silly songs telling us to be happy and not worry about a thing, so long as we buy their $18 CD, to support their lavish lifestyle. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy good music and I support the arts, however; one thing is supporting an artist, listening to music that people spend hours upon hours of practice to refine their talent, and another thing is paying a good looking, super done up person who had the courage to perform and found him or herself at the right place at the right time, a great deal of money for a record or even an more absurd amount of money to attend what society calls a concert. This phenomenon is something I personally don't understand. Several thousand people gathered in a huge park or better yet, a closed entity, all hysterically screaming, sweating and pushing themselves forward to be closer to this fan-entitled immortal being, aka, singer/band. From an outsiders' perspective don't these people look absurd? They are screaming to the point of unconsciousness pushing other people, often enraging themselves and maybe even engaging in brawls and fights! In 2 hours these singers make how much money? I don't think they pay to rent the facility out, in fact, they are paid to perform. They probably make more money in one concert than many people make a year working full time. That's one concert, but they go "on tour." Jackpot. We pay for that. We, as a mass are their employer, bit it doesn't work like the traditional employer that you may be used to. Be at work five days a week, on time, limited vacation, limited time for sick leave, drink your coffee at your desk while working, etc. We, individually, pay for 2 hours in a lifetime (or, repeat offenders attend multiple concerts), only to be extremely pleased with the work we see and unable to reprimand our employers if they are late or don't fulfill or standards.

Now, again, don't get me wrong listening to live music can be very entertaining and enjoyable but these concerts that are so popular don't make sense to me.

You live and you learn

You live and you learn, hurt, though it may. Today someone told me you make many mistakes when you are young. I think we make many mistakes period but when we are younger we haven't learned from our mistakes quite yet. Or we are just so full of life and energy that we do things without thinking. Or we are still naive and have different expectations of people and life.

I learned a lesson from a mistake I made today. Well, I saw and acknowledged that I had made a mistake, only time will tell if I learn the lesson.

Sense and Sensitivity

Today when I stepped into the elevator to go downstairs, I was hit with the overbearing smell of old lady perfume. It was the same perfume that one of my female relatives used to wear when I was a child in Syria. I started to cry, I remembered hot summers in Damascus, eating ice cream and going for evening walks with my aunt or great aunt and having that smell, incessantly in my nostrils. It even affected the taste of my ice cream. I thought, the world is cruel. I am not with my aunt right now, nor am I seven years old anymore or eating ice cream on a hot summer evening.

I went for my run and pondered the conclusion I had come to and came to a new conclusion. I don't like negativity and I decided that the world is not cruel. How great it is that our senses can trigger memories with such vivid reality that we would not have normally remembered without that whiff of asphalt, the breeze that blows our hair in our face, the taste of sangria or the deep bellow of a violoncello. I wrote in my journal, "our senses are so sensitive," I leaned back and laughed to myself. I had never realized that sense was the root of sensitive. I'm sure I could have told you that if asked but I had never made the connection before. I got to thinking more about it and it makes perfect sense, our senses are sensitive, and that's what's so wonderful about them. That's what makes them our senses, because they are sensitive. They are ours and nobody feels them other than ourselves, they are tied to our history, our past, our experiences, memories and everything that makes us us. I decided that I am glad my senses are so sensitive, I am blessed to have had such wonderful experiences that can so easily be called upon by such simple a thing, as the smell of perfume.

Wilde Quote

Fellow readers, I really do apologize for my absence, my brother was visiting me and then we were joined by our parents at which point we did a mini tour of Spain after I finished work and moved out of my apartment. As you can imagine, it was hectic.

When I was in Madrid with my brother, we stayed with a friend of a friend and on his bookshelf I found Oscar Wilde´s "The Picture of Dorian Gray." I had picked that book up in the same apartment in December and was captivated by the first page but abandonded the book due to upcoming travels. This time, the owner of the book told me to take it and get it back to him whenever I got the chance. He said "to share a book with someone is splendid. To know that someone else is getting use out of the book is satisfying. Otherwise I feel like it´s a waste of space." Cool philosophy!

So now that my family has left, and my life has settled down, I am reading again. I just wanted to share this quote with you because I can really relate to it.

"You know more than you think you know, just as you know less than you want to know." -Lord Henry, pg 28 of Wilde´s "The Picture of Dorian Gray."

I often feel this way, ignorant, there´s so much to know and so little time and I want to be an expert on bee keeping and wine production and speak several languages and astraunomy and biology and you get the picture. However, that doesn´t take away from what I do know, which I often forget.

I think curiousity is a wonderful feeling that we should all strive to keep alive until we die. Otherwise, what are we doing here if not learning and sharing with others what we know, and re-evaluating what we know and listening to others.....?